Sasuke's Barfing Problem
by mel-loves-rocklee
Summary: so practically Sasuke has a barfing problem because he thinks he's fat lol thats pretty much it, its really funny and incredibly random so please read!
1. Chapter 1

**One morning Naruto was wondering around the village streets, when he decided that it was such a nice day to annoy his favourite team mate Sasuke**

**Ok this is the first Fanfiction I have put up in a while, review me if you want more of this story written, because I will gladly write more lol. ok its basically about Sasuke and how he has a problem lol. enjoy!**

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One morning Naruto was wondering around the village streets, when he decided that it was such a nice day to annoy his favourite team mate Sasuke. His favourite team mate was Sakura but she got blown up yesterday because no one likes her. Anyway, Naruto raced towards Sasuke's house.

"I can't wait! I am gonna annoy the crap out of Sasuke! First I am gonna knock on his door continuously, then when he opens the door I am gonna push him over and mess his whole house up!" Naruto happily cheered as he approached the house.

Inside the house, Sasuke was in the bathroom, not feeling too pleased with himself.

"I can't believe I ate that! I am never eating that much again!" he complained. Suddenly there was a knock on the door.

"Oh no! I can't let anyone see me like this!" Sasuke gasped trying to ignore the annoying continuous knocking on his door.

Naruto grew impatient of the fact that his annoying knocking seemed to make no impact on Sasuke.

"What the? Where the hell is Sasuke?" Naruto asked himself before stopping knocking on Sasuke's door.

"Oii! Sasuke! Where the hell are you! You're ruining my fun!" he yelled out.

"Go away!!" Sasuke yelled. Naruto could faintly hear a strange noise before and after Sasuke spoke.

"No! Come and open your door!"

"No! Go!" Sasuke yelled again. Naruto heard the noise more clearly now, it sounded like vomiting.

Was Sasuke vomiting? Why was he vomiting? Naruto thought to himself.

"Sasuke! Are you vomiting!?" Naruto called.

"No! Go away!" an annoyed Sasuke called back, hoping Naruto would disappear.

Naruto was getting fed up with Sasuke's unkindness and opened the door. He marched through the living room but didn't see Sasuke anywhere, so he continued to search around, then opened the door to Sasuke's room. Naruto's mouth dropped and his eyes widened as he saw a bright pink room with pink walls and pink pillows and pink curtains.

"What the f-" Naruto gasped, petrified now noticing the room had purple carpet and had a sailor moon bedspread.

Before the scared Naruto could say another word, his attention was taken from the disturbing room, and drawn to the vomiting sound coming from the bathroom. Naruto knew it could only be one person, so he headed towards the bathroom.

"Sasuke are you in here?" Naruto asked as he opened the door, now seeing what the cause of the sound was.

"Oh my god!! Sasuke what the hell are you doing!?"

"Get out you idiot!" Sasuke screamed quickly taking his finger from his mouth that he previously used to vomit.

"Sasuke why the hell are you doing that!?" Naruto yelled rather taken back by Sasuke's actions. He never knew Sasuke barfed. Sasuke was too ashamed to answer Naruto's question, and just sat still hoping Naruto would just go away and leave him alone.

"Hey! Sasuke answer me you freak! Why are you sticking your finger down your throat like one of those freaks on those TV shows that have problems?!" Naruto yelled again, shocked and confused by his team mate.

Sasuke started to tremble as he turned around to face Naruto. Naruto waited for a response from Sasuke, and then noticed tears in Sasuke's eyes.

"Because I'm fat!!" Sasuke cried.

"What!? Are you kidding?" Naruto asked surprised. Sasuke sadly nodded then reached into his pocket and got out a picture. Naruto concentrated on the picture then frowned once he found out what it was a picture of.

"What the hell?"

"I wish I was thin and sexy like sailor Mars!" Sasuke whined holding up the picture of sailor mars (from sailor moon).

Naruto almost died of shock.

"What the hell! She's a girl! You're not even fat!" Naruto yelled


	2. yes i am fat

"Yes I am

"Yes I am! How dare you say I am not fat you lying bastard!" Sasuke yelled at Naruto, now with tears rolling down his cheeks.

"Ok Sasuke you got problems! I'm not lying! You're like more thinner than me!" Naruto said attempting to calm Sasuke down but failed.

"You're a liar! How come I put on a kilo then! I eat too much!" Sasuke cried, wiping away his tears with his hand.

Naruto frowned.

"It's probably all that training you have been doing, muscle weighs more than fat you know" Naruto tried to explain to stop Sasuke from crying.

"No! I'm too fat!" Sasuke continued stubbornly.

Then suddenly another figure walked into the room.

"What the hell's going on?" Sakura asked as she walked into the room.

"Sakura! What the!" Naruto gasped.

"Oh my god! Don't look at me!" Sasuke screamed covering his face because he was embarrassed about him being 'fat'.

"I thought you blew up and died" Naruto gasped pointing at Sakura in shock, wondering if she was a zombie or not.

"I did die! But then I came back! Bahahahahahhahahahahahahaah!" Sakura yelled then laughed hysterically before vanishing in a puff of smoke. Naruto and Sasuke stood there confused and dumbfounded for a moment then lost interest and returned to the conversation they were having with each other.

"You're not fat Sasuke you idiot!" Naruto yelled. Sasuke wiped another tear from his eye.

"It's easy for you to say because you're a boy!" Sasuke cried.

Naruto froze for a moment, taking in what Sasuke had just said.

"What!?"

"Oh never mind you idiot!" Sasuke frowned, and then looked at his picture of sailor mars.

"Why can't I be thin and sexy like the people from sailor moon?"

"Because you're a boy! ….i hope…"

"Shut up! Of course I'm a boy!"

"But before you said – "

"Shut up! Who cares what I said before"

Sasuke stormed out of the bathroom, with Naruto following close behind him.

"Sasuke you're an idiot and need to get help" Naruto said. Sasuke turned around to face Naruto.

"I am! I am seeing a shrink" Sasuke sighed.

"Thank god, hopefully they can talk some sense into you"

"Shut up! I can't help being fat! I always see everyone staring at me because I'm fat!" Sasuke started to cry again.

"Oh for hells sake Sasuke no one looks at you because you're fat! People don't even think you are fat!" Naruto said once again, sick of saying the same thing over and over again, but nothing seemed to get through Sasuke's thick head.

"I am fat!" Sasuke continued to complain.

"That's it! Let's go ask everyone if you are fat or not! Come on!" Naruto yelled rather annoyed as he pulled Sasuke by the arm out of his house and off to find someone they know.

After searching, soon they came across one of their friends' rock lee.

"Oh perfect! Lee! Do you think Sasuke is fat?" Naruto asked as he approached lee.

"Do I think Sasuke is fat?" Lee repeated, slightly confused.

"Answer truthfully! Because I know that you will try making me feel better!" Sasuke yelled and folded his arms.

"Umm…I do not think you are fat, I do not think anyone is fat…except chouji…" Lee explained slightly confused why he was being asked this question.

"See! You are not fat!" Naruto yelled at Sasuke hoping to get the message through this time.

"But lee is weird! I don't like him! He is lying!" Sasuke complained. Rock lee frowned and stared at Sasuke.

"Well…thank you" he sighed. Naruto pulled Sasuke along to find another person to ask the same question. Rock lee followed just because he can.

Soon the three ninjas came across Orochimaru.

"Oh my god it's Orochimaru!" Naruto yelled pointing at the happy Orochimaru.

"Oh shoosh" Orochimaru giggled.

"umm…" Naruto gulped.

"Orochimaru will tell the truth!" Sasuke whispered to Naruto. Naruto frowned and knew that nothing good would come out of this.

"Ok fine…Orochimaru do you think Sasuke is fat?"

Orochimaru smiled before bursting into laughter.

"Hahaha! Yes! Sasuke you are so fat! You are the fattest thing I ever saw!" he laughed. Naruto and rock lee gasped and Sasuke froze, and then started to cry again.

Orochimaru paused and looked at Sasuke who was crying.

"Umm…there there don't cry! Umm here, have a present!" Orochimaru hushed handing a sailor moon candy to Sasuke to shut him up.

Naruto and lee's eyes widened at the candy, and especially at Sasuke who happily accepted it.

"Wait! I can't eat this! You asshole! You want me to get fatter! I hate you!" Sasuke screamed chucking a tantrum and chucking the candy at Orochimaru, hitting him in the eye.

"Oh god! It burns! Ahh!" Orochimaru screamed running around mentally then running away into the distance.

"How dare you do that to lord Orochimaru!" Kabuto yelled popping up out of no where.

"Ok you! Do you think Sasuke is fat!?" Naruto asked, hoping Kabuto wouldn't say yes and make Sasuke chuck a tantrum again.

"Umm no…" Kabuto said raising an eyebrow.

"See Sasuke you aren't fat!" Naruto said to Sasuke who was still upset.

"Sasuke if you were fat I am sure Naruto would of said it to you by now" lee said, confused why Sasuke thinks he's fat.


	3. the ceiling fan

Everyone fell silent as soon as they heard a low ringing sound

Everyone fell silent as soon as they heard a low ringing sound.

"What the hell is that?" Sasuke frowned. Everyone looked around for the answer to the strange sound they were hearing.

"Oh! It's my mobile" rock lee blushed, taking out of his pocket a small mobile device. He opened it and answered.

"Hello?"

Everyone stared wide eyed, then frowned.

"Ok what the hell" Sasuke said rather annoyed.

"I have no idea" Naruto shrugged. Kabuto stared blankly, not knowing what to do without Orochimaru around.

"Yes I will come back to bed soon" rock lee said.

Everyone stared at rock lee.

"Umm…" Naruto mumbled.

"Yes I will bring condoms" lee continued.

"Ok this is getting weird" Naruto frowned.

"Yeh umm…I am gonna ya know, leave now" Kabuto said, walking away to find Orochimaru.

"Yeh, umm…I am gonna leave now too" Sasuke rolled his eyes and started to walk away.

"Yeh I am coming too" Naruto followed. Everyone left lee behind with his random conversation on the phone.

Later on Naruto, rock lee, Orochimaru, Kabuto, Kidoumaru and Gaara were standing around in a room staring at the ceiling fan.

"Get down you idiot!" Naruto yelled up at the fan.

"Yeh Sasuke, that is dangerous" lee said.

"Go away faggots and leave me alone!" Sasuke hissed and spat like a cat, swiping his hand at everyone.

"Sasuke get off the fan, you are going to break it" Kabuto frowned.

"Thanks for calling me fat you queer!" Sasuke cried. Kabuto rolled his eyes.

"Not this again" he sighed. Sasuke poked his tongue out at Kabuto and swiped at the air again.

"That's it Sasuke, get off the fan now" Orochimaru yelled glaring at the Sasuke who was slowly spinning around.

"Never!" Sasuke yelled.

"Don't make me come up there!" Orochimaru yelled up to Sasuke.

"Dare ya to! Faggot!" Sasuke hissed and swiped. Orochimaru frowned.

"That's it" Orochimaru yelled grabbing a broom. Everyone stared at Orochimaru, unsure of what he was going to do with the broom. Orochimaru poked up at Sasuke with the end of the broom, trying to poke him so he would get down.

Everyone stared.

"Get down!" Orochimaru yelled.

"Go away!" Sasuke hissed, swiping at the broom like an irritated cat.

"Kabuto! Help me!" Orochimaru ordered. Kabuto snapped to attention.

"Yes lord Orochimaru!" he said, quickly grabbing another broom and joining his lord poke at the spinning Sasuke.

Sasuke swiped at both the broom sticks.

"Ok, somehow I don't think this will work" Naruto sighed. Gaara stood and said nothing. Rock lee began to join Orochimaru and Kabuto with poking Sasuke with the end of a broom.

"This is stupid" Kidoumaru sighed, crossing one pair of his arms while another pair was on his hips, while his last pair was hanging at his sides.

"Kidoumaru! You are under my control! Join in!" Orochimaru ordered. Kidoumaru sighed and joined in.

"Ok this isn't getting anywhere!" Naruto yelled rather frustrated now.

"Well do you have any better ideas?" Kabuto asked.

Naruto thought for a moment, then everyone stared at Gaara, who was mysteriously holding a sailor mars Barbie doll.

"Sasuke…if you come down, you can have this sailor mars Barbie doll" Gaara said plainly. Sasuke stared at the sailor mars doll.

"Oh my god! I am so coming down!" Sasuke yelled with excitement.


	4. the ceiling fan and the uncovered secret

Sasuke jumped down and snatched the sailor mars doll from Gaara, then snuggled it

Sasuke jumped down and snatched the sailor mars doll from Gaara, then snuggled it.

"Oh Christ" Naruto sighed. Everyone sighed and looked around the room aimlessly, before hearing a strange noise above them.

"Oh hell no" Kidoumaru sighed, looking up at the ceiling fan.

"Sasuke! What the hell are you doing back up there!?" Naruto yelled, pointing at the slowly spinning Sasuke again.

"I'm fat!" Sasuke sooked hugging his sailor mars doll. Everyone frowned.

"Oh not this again! That's it Sasuke, get down here now or I WILL come up there!" Orochimaru yelled. Sasuke poked his tongue at Orochimaru and stuck the finger up.

Orochimaru frowned.

"That's it!" he yelled again, now climbing onto the table. Everyone stared, wondering what the heck Orochimaru was going to do. To everyone's surprise, Orochimaru got up onto the fan next to Sasuke. The two ninjas looked like complete idiots spinning around on the fan next to one another as they swiped at each other.

"Oh my" lee said looking up at the two freaks.

"How embarrassing…" Kidoumaru groaned burying his head in his hands. Everyone was confused and embarrassed, except Kabuto who was cheering.

"Yes! Go lord Orochimaru! Get him!" he cheered, supporting anything and everything his lord does.

"Don't encourage him" Naruto frowned at Kabuto.

"Kabuto! Get a broom and help me!" Orochimaru ordered. Kabuto did as his lord said and got a broom and started poking Orochimaru.

"Kabuto you idiot! Not me! Sasuke!" Orochimaru yelled hitting the broom away.

Kabuto blushed with embarrassment.

"I am so sorry lord Orochimaru!" Kabuto apologized, and furiously started to jab at Sasuke.

"Give up! I'm not coming down until I am thin!" Sasuke yelled.

"You will come down! I will force you to!" Orochimaru yelled.

"Yeh! He will force you to!" Kabuto repeated Orochimaru like a little suck up.

"Will you three just give up, Sasuke is obviously not going to – " Kidoumaru started to complain but then was cut off when he saw a fly buzzing around the room.

Naruto, rock lee and Gaara stared at Kidoumaru, wondering why he wasn't continuing what he was saying.

"What the!" Naruto shrieked. The three ninjas stared with their jaws dropped and eyes widened at Kidoumaru who was chasing after the fly trying to eat it.

"You're all insane!" Naruto cried then screamed when he felt a big sticky web fly at him, hitting his arm and sticking to it.

"Sorry Naruto" Kidoumaru apologized quickly before chasing after the fly again, shooting spider webs from his mouth at it.

"Well, I guess Kidoumaru is part spider" lee explained to Naruto.

"Ew! That is so disgusting!" Naruto shivered pulling the web off of him.

"Kidoumaru! Stop that immediately! You are getting your spider web all over the floor! I just got them waxed yesterday!" Orochimaru yelled at Kidoumaru.

"Sorry lord Orochimaru but I must catch my lunch!" Kidoumaru laughed continuing to chase the fly.

"I don't find this amusing" Gaara said plainly, then was accidently shot in the face with spider web.

"Sorry Gaara!" Kidoumaru laughed again, still trying to catch the fly. Gaara however was extremely unhappy now, and began to groan and make the sand from his gourd rise.

"Gaara! Put that sand away! You must not harm Kidoumaru, it was an accident" lee quickly said trying to calm Gaara down before he went psycho and killed everyone. Gaara calmed himself and made his sand slowly suck back into his gourd.

"What the hell is that noise?" Naruto wondered out loud looking around. He was hearing the ringing sound again.

"Oh that's my mobile" lee blushed answering it.

"Hello? …..yes I am….do not worry, I will make love to you tonight" he chatted.

"Oh my god…EW! Get away! You are all crazy!" Naruto yelled Spasming.

"Well I wouldn't be crazy if Sasuke just got down and stayed down!" Orochimaru argued.

"It wouldn't be such a big thing if you left me alone!" Sasuke argued back. They both glared at each other before swiping again, along with Kabuto poking Sasuke with the end of the broom.

"Ok I'm done" Kidoumaru smiled walking back over to stand next to Naruto.

"Ew…where did that fly go may I ask?" Naruto glared at Kidoumaru.

"Well…the thing about that is…" Kidoumaru giggled. Gaara sighed.

"He ate it…" he said emotionlessly.

"Oh sweet Jesus!" Naruto gasped moving a step away from Kidoumaru who now looked very sad.

Kidoumaru frowned and sighed when he returned to staring at Orochimaru and Sasuke swiping at each other.

"You do know lord Orochimaru…it would have been easier if you just switched the fans off…" Kidoumaru sighed again, rather embarrassed. Orochimaru paused.

"Kabuto! Switch the fans off!" he ordered.

"Yes lord Orochimaru!" Kabuto cheered and ran to the fan switch, absolutely loving to be ordered around by Orochimaru.

Kabuto switched off the switch and soon later the fans came to a complete halt.

"Now Sasuke! You are getting off that fan!" Orochimaru said.

"Never!" Sasuke bellowed. Orochimaru grew impatient of Sasuke's stubbornness and jumped at him. Orochimaru and Sasuke both went crashing down to the floor.

Everyone gasped.

"Oh my god!" Naruto shrieked, now that he saw that the fall Sasuke and Orochimaru had, left them in a very awkward position.

Orochimaru was on top of Sasuke and their lips were joined. Orochimaru quickly pulled away and was stunned for a moment.

"Oh you sick faggot!" Sasuke yelled spitting and wiping his lips to get what he believed to be 'germs' off.

"Oh my" lee joined in the commotion now that he had finished on the phone.

Kabuto ran to Orochimaru.

"Lord Orochimaru! I thought you said that I was the only one!" he cried.

Orochimaru stared at him, quite puzzled for a moment.

"When did I say that?" he asked.

"Last night!" Kabuto cried. Everyone stared, rather disturbed now by the mental images they were getting in their heads.

"Last night?" Orochimaru asked, glaring at Kabuto, trying to get a secret message to him not to say anything about the events that happened last night. But Kabuto didn't seem to catch his drift.

"When you held me in your arms and whispered that you loved me! And that you will never need anyone else but me!" Kabuto cried again, his eyes filling with tears.

"Oh hell" Orochimaru mumbled.

"Oh sick!" Sasuke gasped. Kidoumaru fainted. Naruto stared. Gaara stood emotionlessly. And rock lee blushed and watched.

"Kabuto shoosh!" Orochimaru muttered hoping Kabuto could lip read. Obviously not.

"Then you threw me on the bed, and took my clothes off, then…" Kabuto started then was cut off when Orochimaru jumped up and silenced him with his hand.

"You idiot Kabuto!" Orochimaru whispered angrily.


	5. Thrusting

The next day, Naruto, Sasuke, rock lee, and Kidoumaru were walking along a pathway, leading to no where in particular

The next day, Naruto, Sasuke, rock lee, and Kidoumaru were walking along a pathway, leading to no where in particular.

"So…why the heck are you hanging with us anyway?" Sasuke asked Kidoumaru, not very impressed.

"Umm….i don't know…" Kidoumaru replied, taping his chin deep into thought.

"Hey is that Orochimaru?" Naruto gasped, pointing straight ahead.

Ahead of them they saw a figure that seemed to coming there way.

"Umm…yeh I think so…why does that matter though?" Kidoumaru asked.

"Well he's holding someone's hand…I didn't know he had a girlfriend" Naruto answered. As they got closer everyone realized that it was not a female who was holding Orochimaru's hand…it was Kabuto. Everyone froze and stared.

"Oh sweet Jesus, now they are out in public with their relationship" Kidoumaru sighed, rather embarrassed that he actually follows and takes orders from Orochimaru.

Once Orochimaru saw the 4 ninjas staring at his hand holding with Kabuto, he quickly snatched his hand away as if nothing ever happened.

"Faggot!" Sasuke yelled. Orochimaru hurried over to them trying to cover everything up.

"Ok shoosh! You may have seen that, but you must not tell anyone! Please I beg you!" Orochimaru begged, getting down on his knees.

"Well I am surprised no one else has seen that when you are practically walking around in public holding hands!" Naruto said, getting a slight shudder at that fact.

"Yeh whatever! Just don't tell anyone" Orochimaru hushed.

"Why should we do anything for you" Sasuke asked.

"Because I am Orochimaru, and everyone should do anything and everything for me" Orochimaru smiled hopeful that the young ninjas would not spread his secret. Sasuke scoffed.

"Yeh whatever, what can you do for us in return?" he asked. Orochimaru thought for a few moments then got an idea.

"I know!" he yelled, causing everyone to look at him.

"I will teach you a good way to loose weight!" Orochimaru grinned, folding his arms with triumph. Sasuke's face lit up.

"Oh my god you are so teaching me!" Sasuke yelled excitedly.

"Only if you keep my secret" Orochimaru said. Sasuke nodded with agreement.

Everyone sighed, and did not like where this was heading.

"Ok well you have to begin like this" Orochimaru began teaching his lessons to Sasuke, and anyone who was paying attention.

"Ew! You creep!" Naruto yelled at Orochimaru, because his first exercising technique consisted of thrusting his pelvis back and forth.

"Oh my goodness!" lee blushed covering his eyes. Kidoumaru sighed and felt more embarrassed. Sasuke on the other hand was watching Orochimaru and beginning to copy his actions.

"Oh god Sasuke! Don't do that! That's so embarrassing!" Naruto complained totally discomfited. While Sasuke and Orochimaru thrusted their pelvis' everyone stared completely horrified, except for Kabuto who was cheering Orochimaru on.

"You should continuously do this for a while, and then start BOOGYING!" Orochimaru cheered then energetically boogied, causing everyone to stare confused.

Kabuto joined the boogie, followed by Sasuke who believed that it would make him loose weight.

"Oh man, how embarrassing" Kidoumaru sighed.

"Lee!" a familiar voice called out. Everyone turned to see a girl with long pink hair and green eyes running over towards them, with two other people following closely behind. One of them was a girl with purple hair and golden yellow eyes. The other was a boy with sky blue hair and heat yellow eyes.

As the three ninjas approached everyone lee's face lit up.

"Selina!" he said cheerfully. The pink haired girl, now identified as Selina jumped on lee, causing him to fall over on the ground.

"Good grief, who the hell are these weirdo's?" Sasuke asked no one in particular.

"These people are, Selina, Shira and Keith" lee introduced but could not continue because Selina forced her lips to meet his.

"Oh for Christ sake!" Naruto mumbled rather grossed out.

"What villages do you come from?" Kabuto asked, suspicious of the 3 ninjas he has never seen or heard about before.

"I come from the sound village" Shira said.

"Oh of course, you idiot Kabuto, you should realize one of our own by the head band!" Orochimaru said to Kabuto.

"Oh…of course" Kabuto blushed.

"And you come from the air village?" Kidoumaru asked the ninja named Keith.

Keith nodded.

"Yes! And I am the number one tails fan!" he yelled lifting his plush tails toy in the air (the character tails from sonic). Everyone stared.

"Ok…" Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"Are you two dating?" Kidoumaru asked, directing that question at rock lee that was on the ground with Selina on top of him, smothering him in kisses. Lee blushed.

"Uh…yeh" he said quietly.

"So that's who your random mobile conversations have been with" Naruto said. Lee blushed again.

"I love my rock lee!" Selina giggled as she nuzzled lee's neck.

"Oh dear god…" Orochimaru mumbled raising an eyebrow.

"I'm dating Gaara!" Shira said, joining the conversation.

"I'm dating…someone" Keith said to join in.

"That's great…back to the exercises!" Orochimaru cheered, now thrusting again.

Everyone stared wide eyed.

"That's scary" Keith gasped shielding his eyes with his tails toy.

"You like it, admit it" Orochimaru smiled thrusting his pelvis at Keith. Keith jumped behind Shira, quite scared.

"Keep that thing away from me!" Keith cried.

"Please thrust my way lord Orochimaru!" Kabuto begged. Everyone stared horrified at Kabuto.

"That is so wrong" Kidoumaru shivered.

Sasuke joined Orochimaru with the thrusting.

"Come on everyone, loose weight and thrust!" Orochimaru ordered. Kabuto immediately started thrusting.

"I refuse to look like an idiot" Naruto frowned.

"Yay! Thrusting time!" Selina cheered and jumped up from the ground and began to thrust like a moron.

"S-Selina!" lee blushed.

"Thrust with me lee!" Selina happily pulled lee up from the ground and thrusted towards him.

"Oh my…" lee blushed totally embarrassed. Shira and Keith shrugged and began to join in the thrusting party.

"This is so embarrassing" Naruto yelled at everyone.

"Hey" a familiar voice greeted. Everyone turned and recognized the figure.

"Gai – sensei!" lee cried with excitement. Happily walking over, Gai eyed the thrusting group.

"Woo! Thrusting time" Gai cried, joining in. Since Gai joined in, lee thought now it would be suitable that he joined in as well.

"Am I the only sane one here!?" Naruto screamed.

"I think we are the only sane ones here" Kidoumaru sighed.

"No way! Man, you eat flies!" Naruto said harshly, causing Kidoumaru to hang his head in shame.

"Gai –sensei, what brings you here?" Selina asked with a slight blush at the thrusting of his pelvis.

"Well, I was actually looking for lee, but then I guess I got caught up in this thrusting frenzy" Gai winked. Selina blushed now that when Gai faced her to speak to her, his pelvis was thrusting her way.

Suddenly another familiar person arrived.

"Gaara!" Shira cried running over to Gaara.

"Shira…what the hell is that?" Gaara asked plainly, pointing at the large group of thrusting ninjas.

"Well…I actually don't know how that stared" Shira said, now looking at how stupid everyone looks just in the middle of no where thrusting their pelvis towards each other. Then Shira felt a sudden feeling of shame that she actually joined in the thrusting celebration.


	6. The beach

The beach

The beach

Naruto, Kidoumaru, Sasuke, Shira, Selina, Keith, Rock Lee, and Gaara all went to the beach to train.

"I'm gonna be Hokage!" Naruto yelled triumphantly.

"Yeah yeah, you keep saying that Naruto, but it never seems to happen, because you're lame" Sasuke frowned.

"I'm not lame!" Naruto yelled.

"Yes you are" Sasuke argued.

"At least I'm not fat" Naruto argued back. Sasuke paused and death stared him.

"That's it! Too far!" Sasuke yelled, beginning to bash Naruto. Everyone sighed and watched the two fighting morons. Then something caught lee's eye.

"Oh my! Look at that!" Lee cried, pointing down near the water. Everyone paused and looked.

"Oh my god!!" Shira gasped, along with everyone else.

"Ewww!! FAGGOT!" Sasuke screamed.

Down on the beach, near the water, were Orochimaru and Kabuto jogging, in DT's!

"Oh sick!" Naruto vomited. Keith shielded his eyes with his tails toy, Gaara glared, Shira stared in shock, Lee tried to look away, and Kidoumaru hung his head in shame, while Selina had a totally different expression. She stared, totally thrilled by the sight.

"That's gross" Shira shuddered.

"That's just wrong" Kidoumaru sighed.

"That's hot!" Selina drooled. Everyone stared at Selina, as their faces turned green.

Down on the beach Orochimaru and Kabuto stopped jogging, and started pashing.

Everyone gasped then vomited.

"This is so great!" Selina cheered.

"No its not!" Sasuke growled.

"Why?" Selina asked

"Because!" Sasuke frowned.

"Because they are homos? like you?" Selina teased.

"Oh my god! You are so dead!" Sasuke yelled, bashing Selina.

"Do not bash Selina!" Lee cried.

"Try stop me Bushy brows!" Sasuke yelled.

"I will!" Lee said, starting to bash Sasuke. Everyone stared, until suddenly Orochimaru and Kabuto approached them.

"Sweet Jesus get some pants on man!" Keith cried shielding his eyes with his tails toy again, while slowly backing away. Orochimaru looked down at his DT's then back up to everyone.

"Oh, this…this is our exercise clothes" Orochimaru giggled. Sasuke suddenly stopped fighting with Lee and snapped his attention to Orochimaru and Kabuto.

"Exercise clothes!" he gasped looking down to the DT's.

"Yes, this is our exercise clothes…that's why we are so thin yet muscular" Kabuto explained. Sasuke gasped again.

"Does it really matter what outfit you wear?" he asked, extremely interested.

"Yes it quite does" Orochimaru said.

"No! It doesn't matter!" Shira yelled, trying to push the idea of wearing DT's out of Sasuke's head.

"Oh, but it actually does depend on what you wear. It helps you move around easier when you are wearing less clothing, and.." Lee started, but then was cut off by Shira.

"Thanks Lee…" she sighed.

"I do not understand…what did I do?" Lee asked. Everyone glanced at Sasuke who was begging Orochimaru for DT's.

"That is what you did" Shira sighed again.

"Ok! I am not walking around with Sasuke if he is going to wear that!" Naruto yelled. Everyone nodded in agreement.

"I could offer Sasuke to wear spandex. It basically has the same effect that DT's would" Lee explained.

"Ok, I still wouldn't walk around with Sasuke if he was wearing spandex" Gaara mumbled.

"But I always wear spandex" Lee said, rather confused.

"Mmm, you don't wear spandex all the time" Selina said openly (meaning Lee doesn't wear spandex in the bedroom..). Lee blushed.

"Selina!!" he gasped.

"Eww" Kidoumaru sighed.

"Oh it isn't eww, especially when Lee lays me on the bed and.." Selina blurted out until she was silenced by Lee's hand over her mouth.

"Selina! Please do not say such things" Lee gasped while blushing.

"But it's true" Selina tried to say but her words were muffled by Lee's hand.

"Shh" Lee hushed. Everyone stared.

"Good grief…" Keith said, then looking over to Shira, who was currently making out with Gaara.

"Oh dear" Kidoumaru sighed.

"When did that happen?" Naruto asked. Everyone tried to draw their attention away from the making out Shira and Gaara, but then Gaara started to make his weird moaning sounds.

"Oh lord, look at that naughty behaviour" Orochimaru said pointing at Shira and Gaara.

"Yes, naughty behaviour" Kabuto repeated. Then suddenly everyone looked at Sasuke.

"OHHH DEAR GOD!!" everyone screamed, now looking at Sasuke who happened to be wearing white DT's.

"OH GOD THEY'RE SEE THROUGH!!" Kidoumaru screamed.

"OH IT'S HIDIOUS!" Keith screamed.

"Shut up! It's the best you've ever seen!" Sasuke smiled, feeling rather proud of himself.

"Ohhh hell no!" Naruto screamed. Suddenly a weird music started playing.

"Where is that stupid music coming from!?" Orochimaru asked as he looked around.

The music started to get slightly jazzier now.

"Oh my god yes!!" Sasuke cried. Everyone stared at him.

"The jitterbug song!" Sasuke cried. Everyone recognised the song, and stared at Sasuke who was now boogying.

"Yes! The jitterbug song!" Selina cried, starting to boogie next to Sasuke.

"No, you cant boogie to this song, only I can" Sasuke frowned. Selina glared at him.

"Get screwed!" she frowned. Sasuke then glared at her.

"Get lost" he mumbled evilly.

"I hate you" Selina mumbled.

"I hate you too" Sasuke mumbled. Then they both started beating the crap out of each other.

"Do not bash Selina!" Lee cried, saving Selina from being bashed by the DT freak.

"Fight me!" Sasuke yelled at Lee. Lee blushed.

"I would…but it would be very unnecessary to fight you when you are wearing such little clothing" he said.

"You love it" Sasuke growled. Lee took a step backwards.

"Umm, I do not think I ever said I loved you in DT's" he gulped.

"Everyone loves me" Sasuke cried.

"Oh hell no" Selina yelled.

"Shut up you!" Sasuke said, glaring at Selina.

"Make me" Selina glared back. Then 2 seconds later they were bashing each other again. Then suddenly Shino jumped out of a tree…that mysteriously grew on the beach somehow.

"Ya'll eat my bugs now" he said shooting bugs into everyone's mouths. Everyone quickly spat out the bugs, totally grossed out. Except Kidoumaru and Orochimaru who swallowed them, and Kabuto who just followed what Orochimaru did.

"Eww you freak! Why did u shoot bugs into our mouths!?" Naruto yelled at Shino.

"I…don't...know" Shino said plainly.

"Keep em coming" Kidoumaru smiled.

"Now that's just weird" Shira said. Then suddenly Shino clicked play on a CD player, which played the jitterbug song, then he started boogying to it.

"Yes! The jitterbug!" Selina cheered now boogying with Shino.

Soon everyone joined in, except Gaara and Shira who were dry humping each other.


	7. Chapter 7

Just trying to get this fanfic back up from the bottom meshes of naruto fanfiction LOL


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